Friday, June 5, 2015

EASY RIDER.... CASE # 87-14










 HEAR YE     HEAR YE.....   ALL RISE......    His Thwapperlessness.... Frankie Furter's Court is NOW in SESSION...
 ERNIE are all pawties Present and accounted for?
Yes, your THWAPPerness...          We are ready to Pawceed with the Case...
 I am NOT Thwapperless, BTW......    so WATCH YOURSELFS....  
Okey Dokey Hokey Pokey....    I mean...  Your Honorablesome.       I call    MISS YOUR that's the French way of saying Miss Tur.   MISS YOUR   EASY RIDER to the Stand...    
   Miss Your Rider
Call me EASY...

HI Frankie.... it's ME Easy Rider...  the Weimaraner .....    How's your THWAPPER Thwappin today?

WHAT???   What did you say??? 
   Mr. vonSchnitzel....!!!!!  CONTROL your Client...  or you will BOTH be Cooling your Tails and Playing 87,000 games of  Go Squirrel... in the Blogville Jail  !!!!!    I am NOT amused.
     SORRY about that your NO BELLness.     

    FINE, EASY..... and you may call me Ernie...    now let us get to the heart of this matter quickly....      Please tell the court....   what transpired... in your own words...       





First SHE condemned me to buy a new blankie from my pocket money, because I made an airhole in that thingy. it was in self-defense, efurrybuddy who shared a blanket with a human knows that an airhole is our only chance to survive. 

   I can Certainly understand THAT... since I sleep with the Old STINKY FARTer ...
ERNIE......  I am WARNING YOU...   
Sorry your Robedness...     Please pawceed, Easy...
then she wrested my prey: a berds nest. I needed 87 hours to get it and after that 87 hours I anyway got only the package of that takeout, the inmates flew away... and that heartless woman removed the package from my mouth what I tried to prevent with using my paws to smack her one on her lip. lip plumping is the dernier crie and a lot of girls pay a fortune to get such a fabulous rubber dinghy on their snout... so there is no reason to scream like a banshee, right?

and instead to pay me for my nip and;tuck shop she said I'm grounded now and I can furget the next pawty...

I will sue HER furst  for petty larceny of food, yes, she grabbed it directly from my mouth... second for bum rap, because self defense is capped by law, third for robbery and fourth for deprivation of liberty and ruining my life, because of the eventuality I could meet the girl for life or for one night at the pawty.

I also claim some $$  for the lip augmentation, there is no such thing as free lunch in life, right?

please see the evidences I collected to butt-ress my charge:

evidence zero: the lifesaving hole


YES,   ROXY would you please put up EXHIBITIONIST #1?
IMG_0560.JPG
Now let us move ON, Easy....  to your next Exhibition...    Roxy, if you will, please....

evidence one: my empty piggy bank 
IMG_0551.JPG
GASP......  it is TOTALLY empty as we all can see...     THEN What?     
      Flip your lip to the next one, Foxy...

evidence two: the leftovers of the berds nest
IMG_0554.JPG
THAT looks like a FINE Piece of work to ME....   what about You your Humbleness?
I will reserve comment until all the evidence has been pawsented.... thank you very much blubber butt Ernie...     Miss Roxy...  would you please move to the next thingy?
   Yes, WELL.....   one can NOT SQUABble over the fact that Easy DID lose his FRESH FOWL, though...  let's continue with the Evidence...

evidence three: self-defense

IMG_0553.JPG
Again not so bad....       Butt we are about to see a true HORROR with the next slide.  Isn't that correct  Miss Your?  

IT is fur SURE....    Feast (or LOST FEAST) your Eyes on THIS....  
evidence four: the ankle monitor  and YES, Ernie it is an UNSPEAKABLE HORROR to be sure...
IMG_0557.JPG

           KERPLUNK !!!    OMD     OMD      ROXY has SWOONED....       at the sight of it....     Could SOMEBUDDY get her a bowl of cold water?????
SO?????   Do you have more fur the court....    Easy  (AKA... GNAWpawLEON  PawNapart....)

I DO Ernie.....  butt furst.....    Are you OKAY now Roxy?

    I believe I have nearly recovered  Miss Your EASY.    Thank you fur asking.


So after all this.....   did your mom say or do something...  FURther to you or your pawson?

Sadly I could NOT attend the WELCOME TO BLOGVILLE DANCE... IN THE FURS.... because... I was grounded...They said I ruined the blankie (and other things, but that's a lie) . I also ate a berdz nest and I smacked my momma one with my paw and now she wears a rubber dinghy instead lips....
butt  we fortunately have skype, so I WAS able to  be there via screen even though I   (EASY  Clawpone)  was     Alcatrazed :o)

And do you have PROOF of said UNJUST INCLAWSIRATION?  
   I  DO.....     I believe the lovely Miss Roxy has a Picture of my time in the Slammer...  
Could we see this FRESH HELL Horror now please, Roxy...   

SNICK....

tv.png

OH MY......  OH MYYYYYYYYYYYYyyy       That is just NOT Right at ALL...      You were NOT at the Dance in the FURS.... and you had NO way to get to the delicious Foodables...  or to Dance with all the Wimmen????????

THAT is correct Ernie.....  and I throw UP  myself on the MERCY of the Mopheaded Court...      PLEASE  PUNISH my Peeps fur this CRUEL and most usual  UNUSUAL torture of a Poor Silverygraymistyeyed Weimaraner such as myself.
     Now Relax Easy....    we are almost finished....        Breathe Deeply now...         Pant    Pant      Breathe...
I know how upsetting this is for you.....  It is upsetting fur all of us...          butt we need to be CLEAR on these issues...
     Do you maintain your INNOCENCE?

Yes,  Bad Deed   IN Deed I do.

Your Robedness....     I believe that we have  everythingy  Shown and Said... and are now ready fur your VERDICT...   

I  will take all this under my desk Advisement and will RENDER my decision....  TOMORROW....   

{{ THWAPPPPPPPPPpppppp}}
Hot Squirrel.....  I have my Thwapper arm back!!!   

COURT is Dismal DISMISSED.

    


30 comments:

3 doxies said...

Oh dears! I say banish them hoomans to da jail!
At least hers got a free lip augmentation, hers really shouldnt complain.

Puddles

Hailey and Zaphod and their Lady said...

Banish, banish, banish!

Mark Muller said...

aaaah the thwapper arm is back! that's a good sign.... hope that staff gets some thwapps with the thwapper on their butt...
... oh and I hope Roxy is ok.... we should always hve a bottle of that french "Eau de vie" in our pockets before we watch scary pictures :o)
many thanks for helping out a poor silvermistygrey pup who missed the chance to find the girl of his life :o)
easy rider aka gnawpawleon, emperor of france :o)

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari OM
Oh dear....... Something happened my end.... all Easy's spoken evidence is the size of gnat's piss and all the visual aides Roxy worked so hard on, are invisible!!! I shall have to come back later to see if it works better...... though I did magnify the spoken stuffs - Easy sure can tell his story well.............................. But best of all THE THWAPPER ARM IS BACK!!! That at least was visible...Hugs and wags, YAM-aunty xxx

Patrice and Higgins said...

OMD........ho will we ever wait until tomorrow for your rendering decision????????

~Higgins

Julie said...

I haf the same problem as Aunty Yam and missed all the visual aides!
Oh I can't wait to hear the verdict, isn't this sooo excitings!
Loves and licky kisses
Princess Leah xxx

Lassiter Chase and Benjamin said...

Oh no. We can't see the pictures on this post. We will come back later after about 87 snacks.

Frankie Furter and Ernie said...

OMD OMD We don't KNOW why some of you can not see the Visual Aides..... they are showing up on OUR puter. SOOOOOOOOOO sorry... Truly sorry. Don't understand what happened...

♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥ said...

We can see the photos on our Feedly reader but not on the actual blog. We got the full picture just the same. We have to agree with Puddles that Easy's Mom should be grateful that she didn't have to spend lots of green papers to get those lips fattened like those Kardashians. That alone should allow her to replace the blanket at little loss.

Woos - Ciara and Lightning

♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥ said...

Oh, we take it back - only the first four pics show on Feedly:(

Reilly-Denny Cowspotdogs said...

we couldn't see any of the evidence photos - we are calling for a miss trial in this case - no evidence means no case !

Sarge said...

Wow, looks like some technical difficultynesses happening there! Holy cow, that would only happen to Easy's case. BOL I'm thinking Ern and Roxy will need to have a sidebarn or continuanceness or reconveening to fix this. Only for poor Easy. SHESH Meanwhile, we'll all be up in suspenders to see the exhibitterness. BWAR HAR HAR
Grr and Woof,
Sarge, Police Commish

Madi and Mom said...

Well I cannot see all the evidence either but in my humble opinion...yes kitties can be humble...Easy is a purrfect gent and never ever ever does anything wrong so we think his peeps deserve demerits or something
Hugs madi your bfff

Cookie's Comments said...

I could not see the picktures either!!! I thought it was my mum's fault, but I guess others had this problem, so it is not her fault.

Easy, you are such a gorgus weimy -- I really was looking forward to seeing you at the dance and was disappointed that I couldn't.

Hope your mere gets punished really hard

Toodle Pip and au revoir

Cookie

stellaroselong said...

I fink Easy you should start offering your services to all the mom's on blogville for the "fat lip" treatment, my mom has always wanted full lips instead of chicken lips.....we fink you will win and mom will understand just who is in charge at your house.
stella rose

Emma said...

Seems to be an image error on a lot of the photos, or maybe we are supposed to imagine the photos in our heads? No matter, Easy has done nothing wrong, poor guy!

Kismet said...

Throw the case out of court. The picture evidence isn't there. No evidence-no conviction.

Amy Boyer said...

Dear Miss Your Thwapperness: There needs to be some investigative reporting into the number 87. It seems to come up way more than physics or randomness would predict. Is there some significance to that, perhaps a tie-in to your astrological sign or a reference to someone's age? Inquiring minds want to know.

Sketching with Dogs said...

We couldn't see the pictures either, it just said img.
Was this evidence tampering? :)
Dip and Elliot x

MilitaryPugWife said...

No pictures to see!

Two French Bulldogs said...

We see nothing .... No pics. Does that mean NO evidence!
Lily & Edward

Susie and Sidebite said...

Well....somebody unplugged the overhead projecter....but who the hack needs to see...the test-ti-money is bad enough for a very nasty verdit...we say "To the Bastille...To the Basittle...and through the key away"

The Mad Scots

Bella Roxy & Macdui said...

Breathe in 1....2....3... Oh, Ernie, this is the most HARROWING case we've had. I thought I had all the facts under control....BUTT...it was just too much. Thanks for the water. I think I could probably do with a Milkbone and cheese, too.

♥♥♥♥♥ Roxy♥♥♥♥♥♥

The Army of Four said...

We can't see the evidence at all! That must spell "INNOCENT" - don't you think?
Cammie!

Sally Ann and Andy said...

Wow, that is to much drama. I like Milkbones and cheese. I wanted to ask if I could rejoin Blogville as the librarian with Andy as my assistant. My Mommy doesn't have "photoshop" anymore, so I can't join any of the fun blogville events. Andy wanted to be on the soccer team, but we missed the joining date.
Sally Ann and Andy

Dory and the Mama said...

OMD...Poor Easy, he had all his pictures stolen AND he was mistreated....We think he deserves some major spoiling!!!
Smileys!
Dory, Jakey, Arty & Bilbo

Murphy said...

We could NOT see the picture evidence. Was it private and only for the court? We were almost in tears to think how poorly Easy was treated!

Your Pals,

Murphy & Stanley

Ruby said...

Oh man, TREE RATS STOLE THE PICS!!!!! Furst a nestie in my tree, then THIEVERY!!!!
Poooooooooor Eassssssssy!!!!! I can't believes your Moms took the treasure right outta your mouth!!! And not a THANK YOU for her KK lips??!!! Wrong. Just wrong. I am sure that Hizzzzhonor will rule the right way, and gets you your compensation....
Kisses,
Ruby ♥

M. K. Clinton said...

I am thinking that Easy should contact the Kardashians to tell the court how much a good fat lip is worth here in the USA. Although we could not see the photographic evidence, we know that Miss Roxy doesn't faint easily. GUILTY!

JoAnn Stancer said...

I am so sorry your pictures didn't show. The case was awesome even without the pictures.