Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Pawlitical Science Class 2012

links to all the activities and classes will be at the BOTTOM of this post...   

PAWlitical Science Class (PAWly Sigh)

Good Morning Class... Please take your seats and we will be ready to begin.
Please allow me to Introduce myself. I am the current mayor of Blogville. I was elected in November 2010 soon after my marriage to the Lovely Furst Ladies of Blogville, RUBY AND PENNY.

BELLA and Roxy????.... Did you just stick your Name Tags on Sarge's BUTT???

Now... where was I ... Oh, yes...

Blogville has strict TERM LIMITS .. for Mayor one can only EVER be mayor TWICE and each term of office is fur ONE (1) year. THAT my furends means that TODAY I am announcing my intention to RUN FUR MAYOR... fur my Second... and FINAL time.
Running fur ANY PAWlitical Office is some serious bidness. One must have some very impawtant issues taken into consideration before making the final decision to Run. We will be discussing the Mostest imPAWtant of those.. a bit later butt the FURST thingy One MUST have is the total suPAWt of Ones FAMILY. Let me say right away that MY Wives (YOUR Furst Ladies) have given my re-election camPAIN.. their Paws Up. The Furter Pack is all about Service to OUR Community.

Excuse me... Ummmm SASHA ?? Yes   YOU  Dear, I'm wondering why it is you are runnin UP and DOWN the Steps all the time? What.. Oh. Well of course you have to keep checkin on your mom and the AWSOME POSSUM PIZZAs butt NOT during Class. I'm just sayin girrrrrl.

I would like to begin this class by answering TWO questions submitted by: Let me check my notes here.. a Pawlitician should ALWAYS check his/her FACTS before SPEAKING...

Ah YES... just as I thought.. these questions were from William the Scot.

1. What is the difference between a Grass Roots MOVEMENT and Astro Turf?

Excellent question, William. The difference is.. with a Grass Roots Movement... you Poop in the Yard. With Astro Turf... you find that on porches and decks.. and poop there. I(Frankie Furter) find that Pooping on the Roots of the Grass preferable.

2. Is every Dog/Cat going to get a Chicken in Every Pot? Another timely question and quite easy to answer. NO! After the recent and EVIL Squirrelism of the Blogville POOLS... I am going to work to ensure a SQUIRREL in every pot. BUTT that is NOT a PAWmise.

I suppose that MOST of you signed up fur this class beclaws you are interested in Helping somebuddy with THEIR camPAIN or ..... RUNNING One of Your OWN. Is that Right  MADI?????? After you have made sure your Family is ON BOARD you must start considering HOW TO GET FurFolks to ACTUALLY VOTE fur you. In other words... you've Gotta Get Your NAME OUT THERE.... and I'm NOT tawkin havin your mom or dad out there SCREAMIN fur you to COME!! Nope not that at all. You have to have a Voter... SEE and HEAR your NAME AT LEAST EIGHTY SEVEN (87) times... fur them to remember it. And HOW will you be doin THAT you wonder!! EASY PEASY... FURST you gotta get out and GIVE FurFolks STUFFS. YES, You GOTTA have some GRRRRREAT STUFFS to Pass OUT as your are Pressin PAWS on the CamPAIN Trail!! I see all of you out there SCRATCHIN your Butts right now. Wonderin WHAT is this guy tawkin about here? I can't be giving all MY stuffs away. NOT to worry... CamPAIN Giveaway stuffs are thingys that you gotta BUY and then give away.

RUBY...... stop Winkin at me, I'm having trouble thinkin.

Ummmmm Uji and Newby and Milo,   STOP Squeakin those Stuffies... other furFolks can't hear over all that. THANKS Fellas... YES... you MAY Rip their Guts out.. QUIETLY, please.

Could somebuddy get the Lights... I have some Overheads of PAWsible Give Away thingys... LIGHTS OFF please.. OK THANKS!!

HEY......... You two in the second Row.... I can see you... SUSIE and SIDEBITES... you two STOP sniffin your neighbors!!! Sheeesh.. I can't believe such Pupish behavior.

Let's see what we have here on this furst overhead...

Look at these examples Carefully everybuddy. You gotta have stuffs that is WANTED and that will make the VOTER REMEMBER you as a GENEROUS PAWlitian. You MUST have YOUR NAME... and perhaps your SCENT on EVERYTHING you give away.

AND you have to have stuffs fur ALL ages and All SIZES and All INTERESTS. Stuffs like Bones and STICKS and Balls.

You MUST be SURE that you have Give Away stuffs that is aPAWpreeut fur ALL PAWsible VOTERS...

Now I am sure you are wondering WHERE you are supposed to go to GIVE the stuffs away.

Well, you gotta get yourself into EVERY PAWrade. and you walk along Waggin and Passing out your give aways along the entire route. You gotta get yourself invited to LOTS of Dinners of all sorts... like the Annual Feline Society Cat FISH Fry and Cheese tasting. Fur THAT audience I wouldn't take the same GIVE AWAY stuffs as to a meeting of the K-9 Zoomer Lodge.

HEY... SHILOH and TASHA and PEACHES...    Are you three Passing NOTES???
       Goooooood GRIEF !!   THIS class is outta control.  I am gonna have to Sit Down...   AIIIIIIEEEEEEE   OUCH...   PUDDLES... did you put this TACK on my CHAIR????

KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE!!! Speakin of KNOWING your audience.. CASEY... I need for you to come to the front of the class. Please write On the Chalkboard : I will not show my Teefs at my neighbors... 87 times

They will appreciate that you KNOW and UNDERSTAND their Wants and Needs.

And they will REMEMBER YOU on Election DAY!! Speaking of remembering thingys... Benny did you REMIND Lily that we are not supposed to make pee pee in the lecture hall???
MADI and MAX {{Sigh}} settle DOWN. I will be More than glad to give you a couple of Give Aways.... AFTER CLASS... IF IF you stop that Yowlin and be patient. {{SIGH, I just KNEW I should have scheduled MY class AFTER Madi's Nappin Class.. so that you would all be RESTED and ready to LISTEN.}}}

Yes indeed you gotta get your NAME out there and REMEMBERED and one of the best ways is by giving away grrrreat FREE Stuffs.

Declan..  What are you and Beryl Doing... OMD OMD....    NOT During my Class!!!!  THAT is fur Biology Class...  


The NEXT thingys that you MUST have are.... SIGNS !!

YES INDEED... SIGNS are Very much imPAWtant fur ANY election. Furst beclaws we all LOVE a good Sign... RIGHT?? I mean they are soooooo handy fur peeing on and all. BUTT they are also grrrreat fur THANKING Your Voting PAWbLICK fur their suPAWt... past and future.

A Good Quality Sign is worth its weight in Milkbones.
See what I mean about QUALITY... don't try to save money on your SIGNS. I put a BUNDLE in mine... as you can tell.

PUDDLES.....   STAY OUTTA That BOOK BAG.     You have already had ONE TOO Many... Pretty soon you will be wantin to go...   "OUT"... Again.

THESE are just SOME of the SIGNS that I (Frankie Furter fur Mayor) have used.

MADI.... Where are you going NOW???    Please sit down and stop visiting with Ruby and Penny... THEY are giving me ENOUGH GRIEF without your help.        Why don't you go sit by PIP and talk about his Birfday plans... NO WAIT... I furgot... NO TALKING IN CLASS...     

So NOW you are askin..... Where is this guy comin from... I can NOT afford all those FREE GIVE AWAY THINGYS AND SIGNS too!! How will I ever get Elected if I can't afford those two??? NOT TO Worry. THAT is something I am here to tell you about... HOW TO FUNd your CamPAIN.

PUDDLES and PIP....    I need fur you two to STOP doing that RIGHT NOW.   Chanting CHEESEBURGERS   over and over and over is NOT RIGHT.  

Now I am very much lucky to have a WONDERFUL Corporate sPAWnsor. Lucy Pays fur all my GIVE AWAYS and my SIGNS. YES SHE DOES!! I couldn't do it without her help. AND all I have to do is.... MENTION that she has... HUNDREDS of AVON PAWducts fur sale. Stuffs like Furs Colors and Spot Removers and a NEW PAWduct... GAS BE GONE.

Shop Lucy's Avon fur all your PAWsonal Needs.

Now if we can wake Pip Sarge Oskar and Dixie up... we will take our BREAK... Remember there is POSSUM PIZZA  and all the Pupsi Coola PAWducts you can eat and drink.. Right outside the Main Door.

OKAY CLASS.....   I hope that you enjoyed your break...  and that you DID use the Trees before coming back in...   
    RUBY and PENNY... You two MUST stop Saying that... at least fur while I am TRYING to teach this class..     I simply can NOT concentrate with you puttin thoughts like that in my head     TALKING OUT without Pawmission.    

OMD OMD...... WHO put That picture up on the Overhead???? PENNY... did YOU do that???

To find quick and easy LINKS to all of the other activities go to See SARGE

Now class we will resume our PAWli Sci. Class...   as soon as PUDDLES and PIP quit digging around in that Back Pack..     I     DO   know what you two are up to!!!     

OK Class.... Let's get UP and do some Stretches and some BELCHING before we Start... That should help keep you in your seats and behavin yourselves for this session. At least I HOPE it will.
Now.... as you SillyBus states... we have already covered stuffs like... GIVE AWAYS and SIGNS and CORPORATE sPAWnsorships and I have answered a couple of your questions.

Another question I was asked is..... What is your opinion of PAWlitical Parties?

Easy one to answer... I am.... ALL Fur PAWTIES. In fact around Blogville I kinda have a Reputation fur being a PAWTY ANIMAL.
Now I want to give you some other thingys to remember. I really recommend that you take NOTES... READY... ??? FURST... the BIG RULE:
ONE furperson... ONE VOTE... you are NOT allowed to OVER STUFF the ballot boxes... which is the Opposit of UN-Stuffin a toy. You can NOT Vote more than ONE time during an election.
.... You are gonna need to KISS a LOT of Kitties and Puppies.
You must be Cautious about Sniffin while you are on the CamPAIN trail. You know what I am referrin to here... I don't mean squirrels or road kill... if you get my drift.
Don't be TOO specific when you are makin Speeches..... We will address CamPAIN PAWmises when I answer Rubie's question about Truth Bending and Cover Ups and stuffs...
You must avoid PUBLIC DISPLAYS... such as Butt Scooting.
You gotta go to lots of places like Libraries, Hospitals, Nursing Homes, Dinners .Veteran's Homes, and County Fairs. SO you need to PRACTICE your Waggin and always be Well Groomed.
As I said earlier..... YOU and YOUR NAME MUST be SEEN 87 Times fur the Voters to
Remember you on Election day!!

Let us REvisit the issue of Corporate sPAWnsorship. As I told you.. My camPAINS are all sponsored by LUCY and her AMAZING Avon PAWducts. I was REALLY lucky to have gotten a SpawNSOR who is totally trustworthy!!! You WILL need a sponsor to get the Give Away stuffs and SIGNS so that your name and face are out there MORE than 87 times ... just to be SURE.. sooooooo you WILL be needing that sPAWnsor to pay fur the stuffs... BUTT here is the thingy... Let's say you get a PeeMail offering you 87 green papers fur your camPAIN stuffs and it is signed


A. Nutter, President,Rodent World.. Ready Made Nests and Pre-Packaged Nuts

WOULD YOU TAKE the Green Papers??? Sure... it's Free Right.

BUTT the next day you get ANOTHER peemail Offering you ANOTHER 87 green papers and saying THIS: Our world is full of Rodents and they are Nothing butt Nuts in Nests !!

No Problem... RIGHT beclaws we Do Believe that don't we??
Sooooo you spend that 87 green papers and they say HERE... do you want ANOTHER 87 green papers?? All you have to do is SAY.. "Do you want Nuts in Nests?? Go check out the Rodent's World.

The NEXT time that A.Nutter pee mails and offers you green papers he says... "All you gotta say is.... Go to Rodent World for all your Nest and Nut Needs!"

You gotta say it... THAT way beclaws you have Already said the words and he can PROVE you did... he just changed the order a tiny bit.

And guess what... my budding PAWlitcians??? YOU just got SQUIRRELED!

So--- WATCH OUT for WHO you take your HELP from. You don't want somethingy to come Back and BITE you on the BUTT! I'm just sayin.

PAWly Sigh class is now dismissed.

NO BELCHING afterwards though...  AND be SURE you Pee BEFORE your NEXT Class Starts...

  NOW.... Here are the LINKS to OTHER thingys going on... 
Fur Buying Door Prize Tickets and fur taking RIDES on the Bumble Bee and Yellow Plane and... to buy an APPLE fur your TEACHER(s) go to      Mona and Weenie's Blog       Remember this is to help Miss SANDRA of our Beloved Houston Pittie Pack .   

TEACHER      CLASS Title(s)    
Higgins       Class      Security 101 How to Serve and Pawtect
Nora          Class       How to train a Foster Brother or Sister
Kelly            Class      Dieting
Noodles        Class      Walking like a Prince or Princess

Nola           Class       Modeling and OR Minion Ruling

Echo          Class      Comfy Places to Rest or Sleep     AND...   a super LUNCH BOOTH  
Frankie Furter         Class         PAWli Sci.

Jazzi      Class         Creative Table Snatching

Kresty Krew        Class  # 1 Jimnastikals    and   Class #2   Deportment

Sarge     to SEE ALL of  the BACKPACKS    and  fur  seeing the   BOOKS for Door Prize drawing

Pip          Drawing fur DoorPrize.. BOOKS only

Puddles       Drawing fur Door Prize... Scarf Only

Casey        Class         Back to School Fashion Tips

Sasha    Awesome Possum Pizza Booth and Rolling TRUCK...  available fur Class Break times too...
Tucker         Class        How to Chews Toys

Milo Dixie and Newby      Class #1. Dachshund German fur Peeps  and  
                                      Class # 2. College Prep.  Blanket Fluffing

Daisy Bella & Roxy       Class         Mathematics 121   Dog/Cat to Treat Correspondence

Madi        Class     Napping 101           AND the SCARF for the Door Prize

Mona & Weenie    Class     School Bus Riding Rules       
            PLUS   This is where you will find the
CHIP IN for Door Prizes (2 book set and Crocheted Scarf)  
 AND .....ALSO  the  
  CHIP IN for Bumble Bee and Plane RIDES and Apples for your Teacher(s)
      THESE CHIP IN THINGYS    are for Miss Sandra and the Houston Pittie Pack...   to help them get settled in their new home...    A very special Lady.. is going to MATCH what we earn here up to $500.00.  


3 doxies said...

Oh my bad Techer Furter-Price, I seriously not means fur dat spit ball to hit you between da eyes...hehehehe.
No, I ain't drinkin' in class eithers...bwhahahahaha. Um, can I has a hall pass?


Remington said...

That is some class! How do you keep everyone one in line? Oh yeah, one thing....ease up on Miss Sasha....I don't want to have to come over there in person to straighten things know what I mean, right? She's pretty important to me.... No, No....that isn't a threat....I am just suggesting....

Angels Amber and Max DaWeenie and Mom said...

What a fun class, Mr. Teacher Fwankie! Me feels all ed-u-cated in Pawly Ticks now. What was dat bout howlin your name 87 times into someone's eardrum and given out signs wit directions to da fire hydrants? UhOh...maybes I missed sometin.

Anonymous said...

Oh My, we are overloaded with the pawlit stuff, we are going home with notes and copies of your badges and sign for the campaign to get you reelected. Next time PLEASE move us away from Puddles, the spit balls were out of control. Who allowed him to bring an 87 quart ice chest on wheels in class. As for the sniffing, WE ARE SCOTTIES and thats what we do!! Great Class

Your Campaign Helpers
Susie & Bites

GOOSE said...

I gotta kiss kitties to be an elected official? welp that counts me out. To dangerous. Glad I popped in to this class other wise I would be in trouble. Thanks Mr. Mayor.

Scooter said...

Hey Your Honor Mayor Furter Teacher Guy!
Wow, I'm getting all kinds of snickers about being called Bella & Roxy...gotta get those nametags off of my butt fur. BOL Gosh, I think your give-aways are perfect for mean...getting votes. Those stick give-aways are sure to help. Your class seems just a bit out-of-control, but I'm totally OFF DUTY! BWAR HAR HAR. It sure is fun and you're giving great info.
Grr and Woof,
Sarge, Super Student

Matilda the Boxer said...

But Professor Frankie, I was just smiling! How can you punish me for smiling?!

Huff. FINE. Whatever. You just lost your apple.

I will not show my Teefs at my neighbor.
I will not show my Teefs at my neighbor.
I will not show my Teefs at my neighbor.
I will not show my Teefs at my neighbor...

Frankie Furter and Ernie said...

Ummmmmmmmmm I am pretty emBAREasssed about this... See I used my notes from LAST Year's Class and I furgot to tell you that Since THERE are term limits and I (Frankie Furter) have been mayor fur TWO TERMS... I am REALLY NOT N O T runnin fur Mayor Again... BUTT I do support Miss MADI fur HER run fur Mayor of Blogville. I'm Frankie and I PROVE this MESS.
PeeS... Will somebuddy PLEASE help me get this SPIT WAD outta my FURS??? Darn YOU, Puddles.

The Slimmer Pugs, Kitties, and Mama said...

Isa so glad that you enjoyed my birthday pupcakes. Wesa so enjoyed your Pawlitical Science Class of were our favorite teacher.
Much Luvums,
The Slimmer Puggums, more specifically Gracie Lynn ('da birthday girl)

Jans Funny Farm said...

Oh, good, you're running for mayor again.

That should be an interesting class.

3 doxies said...

You might wanna watch oout cuz Goose brought water balloons...hehehehe.

Okays, okays...."To da princi-pals office I go...To da princi-pals office igo"...lalalalalala.

Puddles...Class Clown and Madi's Camp Pain manager

VOTE MADI fur Mayor

WFT Nobby said...

Frankie, that was an awesome class, you were totally in control throughout. Now I can see how you rose to be mayor. And your lesson in how to avoid getting squirreled was just beyond priceless.
Thank you thank you thank you.
Toodle pip!
Bertie (hoping to be teacher's pet, but I guess the competition will be stiff.)

ShellePenn said...

I think if our presidential elections were as interesting as your post we'd give a squirrels butt about them

Shelle, Milo, Dixie and Newby,

Anonymous said...

Hahahhahahha! Oh Frankie you are the bestest Pawlysci Teach evah! Sure is a lot of work Campaining :O Guess I feel better about payin taxes now so our fine pawliticians can get paid for all the pain they went through in camp! ;)

Great class my furiend. Sorry bout the real wet one between the eyes. Puddles ran out of spit and asked me for some drool. Guy's gotta always say Yes to the gals eh pal ;)

Waggin at ya,

Ziggy Stardust said...

Frankie ooohhh did you read my Remingtons comment?? No one is gonna mess with this girl...just sayin. This was an excellent class and no I was not sleeping at times just reting my eyes. You have my vote for sure. Ernie was so much fun on the bus today. Could you please ask him again not to bring food in the bouncy house,it is such a mess and he won't listen to me. OMD Puddles just found the keys for the truck I have to go. PUDDLES!! NO we don't need any more squirrel!!

Loveys Sasha

stellaroselong said...

Mr. Mayor ..thank you for making me feel so welcome today in school...i am glad you realize my mom is an idiot robot who cannot even remember which class I am to go to...or figure out how to buy raffle tickets, yes, that is why I eventually ended up roaming the hallways carrying my backpack without a hall pass and looking forlorn, plus I was a little tardy to caseys class. Noodles, even took pity on me, and gave me an award because she believes I am a true princess at heart...thank you again.
Your Humble Pug
Stella Rose Long

Ziggy Stardust said...

I wil be happy to give my full support to my sweet pal Madi for Mayor. Do you know who put the sign on my butt that says "pull my tail"? Oh wait...PUDDLES!
Ernie seems like he is having a blast in the bouncy house

Loveys Sasha

Uji, Angel Izzy, Ziggy, Angel Bean, Angel Hiro and Momma Tea said...

Goooooolly Frankie dats sure wos a lots ovs stuff to absorbs into our bwains fur sure. Wee knows now wee does nots havs da head fur politikal fings at alls . Yoo is always gonna havs our vote.
Wee dids lovs yor class tho Fank yoo fur bein a kewl teecher
Da K Krew
PeeS. Mee Uji is sorrisome fur squeekin da stuffy

Frank The Tank said...

Thank you for my pawsome thank you card, I love getting mail! what a rowdy class you had today, you need to borrow Sarges police dog whistle and restore some order, been laughing at all the madness with the spit ball and the names on sarges behind, very funny! I can't believe you have to give up your mayor title, when are re-elections? I love you as mayor Frankie your the best and think of the best things to keep us blogvillians happy and occupied from your amazing Olympics to this back to school event, its great to take a back seat this time and watch it all! love, licks and hugs from Frank XxxxxxX

3 doxies said...

Hahahahaha...guess what I done? I stoled Sasha's snack truck and everything went all flyin' all overs da place and I hitted all kinds of speed bumps and went BOMP BOMP KABLAM...dat is what you calls a joy ride...woooohoooooo!


Sweet William The Scot said...

You forgot to endorse your commercial for Mayor about 87 zillion times!
Thanks for being a friend
Sweet William The Scot

Lorenza said...

I wish my mom had remembered to sign me for your class! Hmm...
Of course I will support your campawin!
Go for it!
Kisses and hugs

The Websters said...

Oh wow. Maybe you need a para next time to keep all those naughty students in line.


Two French Bulldogs said... pee pee in the hall....we sure learned a lot from these pat ical classes. Momma is cracking up
Benny & Lily

sprinkles said...

My boys keep going on and on about how much they learned from your class. We don't have any $ to contribute for your corporate sponsorship, but we'd love to help get you reelected. Please give us the word and we'll be happy to help in any way we can.