Here is our FURST ONE... You all KNOW that it is Dangerous and RUDE fur our peeps to be getting on OUR furnitures... They take up SO much Space... They Might push us OFF...
SO we gotta TRAIN them to KEEP OFF... Find their OWN places to Sleep/Nap... take in some Animal Planet on the TV and stuffs like that..
Tip #1.... When THEY try to get your attention by Scratching and Clawing... Tell them... NO.
Say... GET BACK.... THIS is OUR Nap time... you MUST be FIRM butt not Mean.
and you all KNOW they WILL... IGNORE them... do NOT make Eyeball contact... NO sniffs or licks.... THOSE thingys will just Reinforce the Rude and Dangerous behavior. Be FIRM and CONSISTANT.... you can't let them have THEIR WAY...
(and don't believe that you can't teach an OLD Peep....new thingys)... THEY are more difficult to train.. butt it CAN be done. Just do NOT let them get by with any of their "STUFFS".
So how do you do this?? WELL you stand there and say... that HORRID word...
WAIT Wait fur it... Good... Good... WAIT... WAIT WAIT WAIT...
WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT FUR IT.... WAIT not now WAIT WAIT it isn't time YET.... WAIT wait some more WAIT NOT NOW... PRETTY SOON
wait WAIT AND THEN.... ABOUT 87 HOURS LATER... YOU GIVE THEM ONE TEENY TINY SMIDGEON OF A CRUMB.
NOW FUR OUR REVIEW... Furends we found this super new place to order stuffs that WE want. You would NOT believe all the PREVIOUSLY FORBIDDEN thingys that WE can use The PEEP's Plastic cards to order STUFFS we have ALWAYS Wanted... and THEY have always kept fur THEMSELVES...
The place has EVERYTHING... and it is all ALL ALL ours... once we get the Plastic Cards away from our peeps fur like 87 seconds... HERE is the BOX... from Gnawing.CoW
SEE.... it came addressed to US !!!
now did we mention that Gnawing.coW... has a REAL sense of HUMOR... They have these PLAY on WORDS treats... PEEPS as in our PEEPLES... and they are Chickies... as in the kind that go peep peep peep all the time...UNTIL they get big and go Cluck Cluck or Cock A Doodle Doo.. Isn't that the FUNNIEST thingy EVER??
So we ordered a BUNCH of PEEPS...
Disclaimer... WE DID have to give Gnawing.coW all the numbers on mom's Plastic FLEAsa Card..in exchange fur the thingys that they shipped to US...
AND GUESS WHAT ELSE.... Gnawing.coW... will ship ANYWHERE in ALL of BLOGVILLE... so NONE OF OUR FURENDS will BE LEFT OUT...like with OTHER Shopping places everybuddy keeps hearing about... Isn't THAT grrrrreat?
our mom's and dad's have been CHEATING and HOLDING OUT on US... THESE thingys are MAHVELOUS. WE have ALWAYS KNOWN that our "PEEPS" were mean and Stingy and were keeping the GOOD STUFFS fur themselves.
OMD OMD... let us tell you this..
GREEN and BLUE sugary stuffs tastes AMAZING... and you can sprinkle it all over the floors and get it in your FURS and OH the soft gooey Marshmallowy stuffs... it sticks to your Teefs in the most Drool Producing Manner.. And WE think they are not only SWEET... butt they actually have a HINT of that delicious CHICKENie FLAVOR in them. Just sayin.
AND let us tell you about the M & M thingys... M= mouth watering & M= Marvels
YES, furends M & M's are SUPER... and our mom's and dad's have been keeping them ALL to themselves ALL THIS TIME.
Do you see those Shiny Purple and Gold Round thingys??? THOSE are somethingy ELSE they have been HOARDING. THOSE are full of PEANUT BUTTER Goodness.
We will wait until you have all recovered from your respective FAINTS...
Okay now that you are all with us again... THESE are OUTSTANDING... you KNOW how we all ADORE our Peanut Butter ... well these are PEANUT BUTTER.... COVERED WITH CHOCOLATE... YES they ARE... and they are to FAINT fur.
SO.... if YOU would like some FABULOUS FORBIDDEN SNACKS... just Grab your Mom's FLEAsa CARD
PeeS.... Happy April Fool's Day...