Friday, December 4, 2015

Episode # 4... of the Snow Freak HORROR.

This is a Two Pawt Post....
   Let us get the HORROR over with Quickly...

This thingy was a HOUSE WARMING... GIFT??????  from Little girl and her mom and dad...   They MADE him fur us....   Sheesh... we THOUGHT Little Girl was our FUREND... even though her Cassie sort of Scares us beclaws She is so BIG...      BUTT Little girl???  LITTLE GIRRRRL...  How COULD you?    Sniff   Sniffle Sob...         You are so SWEET...  How Could you???   


Now fur Pawt 2.   
    Today is our Buddy Ranger's Whacky Holiday thingy...   and we are supposed to Write a letter to Santa Paws saying how NICE we are..   AND then telling Santa Paws what is on our LIST this year..   OKAY....  HERE GOES...

**************************   Our Letter and List  **********************
Dear Santa Paws,
    This is Frankie and Ernie...  you Remember US don't you?   We are the Bestest mostest Well behaved Dachshunds who Used to Live on... THE HILL...  and Now we Live
 in Pencil Vane E Ah...  so be SURE you Write that Down...     We have NOT Ever Peed or Pooped Inside our new house...   we have not ever torn up the carpets or furnitures here...  we NEVER leave our yard (not since the Fence was installed, anyway)...    We worked HARD to get us all moved and to FIT in this Much Smaller house...   
   OH and did we say that we Gwalked a Moley... and removed that thingy from the yard so dad won't have to ride John the Deers through its big ol HOLE in the Ground?Did we also say that we have dug 87 billion holes since we got here...   now that we have FLAT LAND we want it to be TOTALLY SMOOTH and stuffs..
    And did we tell you that we have not bitten ANY of the new neighbors?  NOT a Single One..
  OH and ANOTHER good thingy we have done since our Arrival
 Here In PENCIL VANE E AH...    We have Totally Re TRAINED Miss Donna The Letter Lady...  She now knows EXACTLY WERE WE LIVE..  we HOPE that YOU do too... and she is Delivering THOUSANDS of Cards to us on a Daily Basis...    WE are good teachers.  AND we are KIND and GENEROUS...
     OKAY.... you get the point.... WE are PAWFECT Dachshunds  ...  and We plan to stay that way...fur the next 21 days.        Butt we DO feel that we have been... exceptionally Hard on the SQUIRRELS of the world this year...  and we want to make it up to them.... 

 ******   BELOW Please See Our LIST  ***
Santa Paws.... THIS will be an Easy one fur YOU....
 WE are going to GIVE this year...  we don't want you to LEAVE ANYTHING...   here... 
 What WE are asking will be EASY fur You...
  We want to GIVE AWAY... a BUNCH of Stuffs... it will all be OUT and EASY ACCESS fur YOU... and by the time you get to OUR NEW HOUSE IN PENCIL VANE E Ah...   you will have PLENTY of ROOM fur all of it...to fit in your sleigh..   Since you will have ALREADY been to a BIG pawt of the world Dropping grand and glorious gifts off to furends...

OKAY Santa Paws...   we want you to as you to Gather up all the LOVELY Snow Freaks that you see... and GIVE them to the POOR and UNFORTUNATE SQUIRRELS throughout the World.    
   You see Santa Paws, This year we are going to feel the JOY of GIVING... rather than Getting.
         TAKE THEM ALL...     We want to GIVE ...  GIVE AND GIVE.... to those Squirrels... Make this a Christmas that THEY will NEVER furget...     
    Don't leave a Single Snow Freak behind.      The Squirrel World will be SO THANKFUL to have 87 Squillion Snow Freaks... they will Fall from their nests High Up in the Trees.    Squirrels will be Dropping like RAIN DROPS in April...    and we KNOW they will LOVE the Selfless Gesture.      WE know that all the little squirrels will wake up MESMERIZED by the hideous evil STARING EYES wonder of those Snow Freaks.    
    WE THANK YOU SANTA PAWS fur helping US make this a Season of TRUE GIVING...
Sincerely,
   Frankie Furter and Ernie the Attorney...   WHO NOW LIVE IN Pencil Vane E Ah...

26 comments:

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari OM
Brwwwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
Oh you guys. That is nearly as evil as the freaks themselves..... Brilliance!!!
Hugs and wags, YAM-aunty xxx

Emma said...

We don't mind the snowmen/freaks, so maybe Santa could deliver the squirrels and snowmen to our house? We would take them all in and believe me, I would be more than happy to "take care of" the squirrels, especially.

Hailey and Zaphod and their Lady said...

Aren't you a little afraid the squirrels and snow freaks may start an army? That would be very scary. Your letter was great!

Oz theTerrier said...

BOL! Do you really think your momma is going to let Santa Paws take away all HER snow freaks without a fight?!? I am just sayin...there may be mayhem at your house on Christmas night (and if so, be sure to video it so we can all see)!
Oz

The Florida Furkids said...

How generous of you to send all the Snow Freaks to the squirrels!

The Florida Furkids

Mark Muller said...

that are two great wishlist and I hope so much that Santa honors that fact that all neighbors and peeps of PA are still in one piece and no one is chewed...
I bet the squirrels will jump with joy... efurry snowfreak has a nice squirrel chewing stick in the middle of his face :o)

Casey said...

OMD, you guys are BRILLIANT!!

Madi and Mom said...

FnE....what a wonderful letter to Sandy Pawz...you have been the best citizens of the world and you make everyone smile...for sure there will be a few unexpected treats just for two Dachshunds.

MOL MOL MOL MOL only you two would think of giving snowfreaks to all the poor unfortunate squirrels in the world. That cracked mom up..thankfully her mouth was void of hot liquid
Hugs madi your bfff

Kismet said...

That housewarming gift can really warm your house. All you need is a fireplace and a match.

Cookie's Comments said...

Hey Frankie and Ernie

Seeing you have moved to a new State, have you, Frankie, taken you PA Judging tests to become a Judge in the Court of Common Fleas (or whatever it is called in the Commonwealth of PA) and Ernie, have you taken your Bar Exam to become an attorney in PA? Just saying. I am sure there are LOTS of cases piling up for both of you!!

ttfn and toodle pip

Cookie

p.s. mum has to go down to courthouse and file some papers today -- but she says she will try to take some pics and post them soon

Mara said...

Well, if Santa doesn´t like that letter, he should take another job. I think it´s beautiful.

Mara from Norway

Dory and the Mama said...

What giving pups you are!! We think you guys did a great job writing that letter and don't how Santa could say no to you!!!

Smileys!
Dory, Jakey, Arty & Bibo

Bailey said...

Frankie I know you'll find this hard to believe but those little people love the snow freaks. We keep telling that you have to replace the snow freaks with Christmas themed dogs. Mom will get the hint soon.

I think the squirrels would love the snow freaks. I'm sure Santa will leave extra bones over your thoughtfulness.

Idaho PugRanch said...

You two have hand your paws full with moving and getting all your new neighbors introduced to you and stuff - you surely deserve a wonderful Christmas. So thoughtful of you to think of the squirrels
hugs
Mr Bailey, Hazel & Mabel

C.L.W.STEP said...

You guys are so crafty to have thought up this secret plan to give the snow freaks to the Evil Squirrel Cartel! Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Poodle At Play said...

What a nice gesture you are making! Those squirrels will LOVE all those snowfreaks for sure!
...though...on second thought...that may not be a good thing. What if they get along too well and go and join forces?? Yikes!

Whitley Westie said...

BOL BOL!

Lassiter Chase and Benjamin said...

You are too kind letting the squirrels have all the snowfreaks!

Ruby said...

BOL!!! OMD, boys those are some FABulous reasons for Santa Paws to come and giveaway ALL the SnowFreaks he can find!! I mean, you boys are just so GIVING to those sneaky little tree rats all those SnowFreaks so they can be SO freaked out that they stop eatin' all my acorns!!! (and drinkin' my margaritas! someone has been drinkin' them...and it couldn't have been MOI! just sayin'!)
Kisses,
Ruby ♥

M. K. Clinton said...

This is a super terrific plan. It is always better to give snow freaks than to receive them! BOL!

LBJ said...

I am afraid my Mom said to tell you that the Snow Freaks are on the Santa "NO-FLY" list. Perhaps Amtrack tickets for them, to sunny Florida?

wags
Abby Lab

Foley Monster, Pocket and River Song said...

We have our eyes peeled for that snow. So far so good. We keep precautionary peeing

STELLA and RORY from Down Under said...

Helloooooo Mr Frankie and Ernie. We can only say we're glad we don't have squirrels here in Oz bwahahaha. It is an excellent idea to give away all your snow freaks. We're glad everything is settled in the new house and it must be exciting to be having your first ever Christmas there. Take care mates. No worries, and love, Stella and Rory

♥Mona + Prissy + Angel Weenie♥ said...

Hehe. Great gift giving idea. Those lucky tree rats!!

Ranger said...

You two are sooooooooooooo generous. What a wonderful idea... to freak out da squirrels. Brilliant.
Wags,
Ranger
Pees...... thank you for joining my Hop

JoAnn Stancer said...

What a great gift from the little girl. Sorry it scares you so. You boys have a nice list for santa.