Friday, March 6, 2015

CLOSED COURT Pawceedings....

Today's Court Pawceedings will be CLOSED to any TV, Radio, or other NEWS Reporting venues...
      BAILIFF..... Please collect EVERY SINGLE PHONE, CAMERA, or other device which could be used to make Audio or Visual Record of this Pawceedings.    
    Be it Known to all in attendance that we will not Tolerate ANY leaks or gossip where the Identity or future location of this witless may become known to others..
    Ernest vonSchnitzel will be the PAWsicuting Attorney today...
     And the Record of this Pawceeding will be HERMETICALLY  Sealed in a Mayonnaise Jar on Funk and Wagnall's Porch.
Alright.... let us pawceed...
     Bailiff   ......   Bring the gentleman in....  and have him seated in the witless chair...

The first thing I want to see is the ACTUAL Interrogation Video of the Witless....

Detective Mickey....  do you have that, and are you ready to show the court?

I DO your Honorable...     ...  HERE it is... butt let me say that    the tape is a bit "Fuzzy" 

Detective Mickey Questioning
 "The Mouth" & FFHT

Remember this guy from the Heart to Heart Dance, trying to steal a Limo. Well, Sarge and Bites caught him in the act. Now I am gonna interrogate this nut. I just don't see this going very well, this goofy bird just wants to peck at things!

"Mouth, you have been caught in the act of stealing a limo, do you know who's vehicle that was?"

"Ahhhhhhhh, no Sir"

"That was the Limo being used by the Mayor Doods, the worst car you could steal"


"That's right.........bird made the statement to Top Cop Sidebite, that you had been paid to steal a limo and create as much havoc as you could..........did you rig the kitchen service door for someone.


"OK, listen up have a simple charge of car stealing....Blogville could go very easy on you if you cooperate and give us what we want to know."

"Alright....yes I rigged the door....I was paid 87 bags of chicken feed for my bunch by PT Crashers Gang, so a couple of them could get in."

"Very, lets continue, we have heard some rumors about another operation.......what's the scoop there?"

"Oh boss...I could get in a lot of trouble here.....them guys are mean"

"Yea....well....The Honorable Judge Frankie is a personal pal of Bites and me..........I can get you a very long a not so nice place!"

"Oh....crap............Ok, and my bunch have been told to disrupt the Mayors Marathon, anyway we know, trip runners.............change route makers and trash the water and potty stops........... Boss they are very mean..............and have made some threatening remarks toward me and my family!................Me an my gal Betty and Sara "Sweet Cheeks", my little thief, were given a plan to steal Sasha's Pizza Truck" here's the deal.........I will tell Frankie to go easy because of the information.............Commissioner Sarge will put you in our Witness Protection Plan and relocate all of you!"

"Lets. proceed.....what else do you know about PT Crasher and his Gang?""

"Let me see..............OH YES...I did over heard a conversation by Nutty "Brains" and Flash "Muscleman"..........that something is in the works to spring PT from prison.........don't know how or when.........they ran me outta the room. 

Oh and they plan on spreading out across all of Blogville and creating as much havoc as possible!.................My bunch was to transport them around, so they could not be traced using a vehicle. I do know where their homes are, and would be willing to give that info to you!"

"Alright Mouth....will get that information to you cell for the did good." 

"Thank you Boss"

Well now.......I am shocked......."it was so much better than I could ever have imagined". 

VERY WELL.      The court can see that the witless was in NO WAY forced to make any statements...and his rights were fully protected....   HOWEVER, we need to have this stated in his own words...  

ERNIE....  will you   please Pawceed with this witless...?

 MOUTH,   you DID give that statement of your own Free range Will, did you not?
 I Did....    it was the truth the Whole Truth and No Yolking about it....  MY crew is in DANGER from PT Crasher's Gang.... if they find out that I Chickened out under questioning and became a stool Pigeon.

(NOTE:   be SURE to click the links for Sarge and BITES... for MORE on this)

 SARGE.....   in the Pawformance of your Duties during the ♥2♥ dance, did you in Fact stop the MOUTH from Stealing the MayorZ Limo?        Yes, I did Ernie and I took him directly to Our Top COP, BITES.   
 BITES,  did you take the MOUTH into enCoopment and advise him of his rights and then interrogate him?  I DID!
      And I have a couple of EXHIBITS that I would like to have entered into the record...
 Your honornest... I offer exhibit A.
 And Exhibit B

VERY WELL....    so let me Tell you all how this is going to go down...    You have spilled your Crop... admitting to trying to steal the MayorZ Limo... and to agreeing to help P.T. Crasher and his gang... disrupt the Mayorz Marathon by moving MARKERS, messing with the potty stations and the the Drink stations and ... Chef Sasha's Foodables...   

MOUTH I am sentencing you to a FINE... which will be Small... Chicken Feed Actually...   
and a Few days of inCOOPeration...   and when you have served your time....YOU will join your Crew in Blogville's Witness Pawtection program...     The folks you see behind you are making all the arrangements to make that happen... and your 
AND I want to WARN you....   Do NOT be Crowing about this with your coopmates....   THIS is a TOP SECRET Proceeding.
NOW, Bites....  Get this...   BIRD BRAIN outta my courtroom....  
{{ THWAP}}



Julie said...

Wow, he was no chicken in turning Stool P Gin!
Lets hope he doesn't fly the coop and return to his evil ways!
Loves and licky kisses
Princess Leah xxx

Angel Pip and Ruby said...

baahahahahahhaahhahahahahaa! Great work with this case!

Birdbrain chirping to his coop mates ...bawhahahahhahaa. This is was hysterical!

Mark Muller said...

hahahaha... do you think he will not crow? Maybe he tries to twitter now?
easy rider

Remi said...

OMD!! You are hilarious!!

Molly TheWally said...

BOL BOL funny and and love the comments too. Have a fabulous Friday.
Best wishes Molly

Anonymous said...

Thank Your Honorness....Hailey has him on the way back to jail...then Sarge will proceed with the witness protection plan..

Justice has been served!

Top Cop Bites

Ranger said...

BOL...... I just love all dis yoking around.
High Paws Ernie.... you did a great job!

Oreo said...

Sounds like a real loud mouth!!!
No Yolk!!! bol


Kismet said...

This is a railroad job. The judge is prejudiced against birds. The interrogation was a sham and the court is secret? We're supposed to have open and honest trials. This should be appealed to the Supreme Court where it will definitely be overturned because the Chief Justice is a real turkey and the associate judges are chicken.

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari OM
Stone the Crows you cocked your snoot at that bloke, eh? Serious stuff, pawfessionally preceedured... Hugs and wags, YAM-aunty xxx

Madi and Mom said...

mol mol mol bird brain mom is rolling on the floor Hizznor this is toooooo funny. OMCS. here I came over to give you a hard time about girlz night out and you got me moling!!
Ok so you men are manly BUTTTTTTTT can you cook, can you problem solve and coordinate an entire family's schedule? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO you cannot
Yours truly Madi,a cougar woman hear me roar

Sarge said...

Hey HizHonnor!
Wow, excellent proceedings today! OMD the documents will be safe on Funk and Wagnall's porch fur sure. BWAR HAR HAR No one will recognize The Mouth once he enters WitLess Protection.
Grr and Woof,
Sarge, Police Commish

stellaroselong said...

Hopefully KFC will NOT be contacting him wif a movie deal or he will screw the whole secret witness program up!
stella rose

Murphy said...

Wow, this was a huge case that was cracked open only because we have the finest pawlice officers with most excellent training. And of course our court does an excellent job! It gives us duck bumps!

Your Pals,

Murphy & Stanley

Pee Ess - Did you see that something strange is going on with the margins on your post?

Sketching with Dogs said...

Glad justice was served - along with a lot of funny puns!
Dip and Elliot x

Dory and the Mama said...

Oh boy I wonder if it was safe to let that bird brain go?? After all...even under protection, he just might blab to PT Crasher!!
Dory, Jakey, Arty & Bilbo

Whitley Westie said...

I still says he shoulda been BBQed.

M. K. Clinton said...

I heard that some of his compadres are running around chickens with their heads chop...never mind. This is a big one going down this time!

Foley Monster and Pocket said...

One thing about those chickens. They always squawk

Bella Roxy & Macdui said...

Hmmmmmmm, hope PT Crasher doesn't find out where he is. He'll be reclining neked on a bed of potatoes and carrots!